Thursday, June 14, 2012

Spectacularly Bad Mom, Of Sorts

I don't care for it when people refer to themselves as their pets' parents. And let it be known that before this Incident I'd already started making moves to find a home for Havuç and Spider. They're lovely but I can't deal with them anymore.

Yesterday, having done my job acceptably well and visited the school where I'm suddenly supposed to register LE under this fucked up new law and talked about everything with the vice principal and gotten us home early and done the shopping and given the kid a Popsicle and done a load of laundry and ordered the heavy things from Sarıyer Market and bathed the kid, I was feeling pretty fucking good about everything when I started a second load of laundry and was ready to tackle dinner.

I'd promised the boy sucuk for dinner, which is easy to cook even though our gas isn't hooked up yet but the electric burner is working fine. So we had some time to hang out and watch crap on YouTube.

Havuç was meowing a lot in the bathroom but he's very meow-y so I don't care, usually.

So I went back there to change my clothes and there was an unpleasant rowling sound coming from the washer, with Havuç sitting there looking upset.


Nope. I shut the machine off and waited for the magnetic latch to click back open.

It was around then I completely lost it. The cat looked all twisted up and without even touching her I sprang to action, certain some neural column was broken and this was the Worst Thing Ever.

I said a lot of bad words.

I tried to figure out how to deal with this.

I called the vet, who luckily was still open.
Then I dumped the kid at our lovely neighbor's, gave her some money for the grocery delivery that was on its way, left a note on our door for the delivery guys, wrapped the wet cat in a towel and bustled down to the vet. On the way, I saw the delivery guys in their truck and tried to wave them down to tell them which apartment to go to, but obviously I looked insane and they snootily waved me off and drove on.

The cat was fine. In shock, but fine. A swelling in her tail that has since passed and the blood must have come from her nose or mouth because she'd gone through 1 or 2 rather powerful spin cycles. The vet shot her up with something for the shock and again, I was wishing he'd give me some too. He gave her an anti-inflammatory for the tail, too.

It's okay if you think it's a little bit funny. I would too if it hadn't been my fault.

Spider is fine. She took a dump on the kitchen floor so she and Havuç spent the rest of the night in the bathroom. I'm sure Havuç was cool with that because he's been falling in love with Spider a little bit. Snippy snippy time.

Clearly I have no business owning cats.


Anonymous said...

Your story made my heart hurt for both of you. Poor kitty! And poor you!

If I was your cat, I would have done a hell of a lot more then just shit in the kitchen. I wouldve shit & pissed on your pillow. But then I'd assume we were square I'd love you again. Cats are great when everything is going well, but they can require a huge amount of time when things aren't going all smoothly.

I'm so sorry you did that! (Big hug!!.)

Stranger said...

I would have shit and pissed on my pillow too, if I were here. Shit on tile floor was a strange sort of blessing.

She loves me again. She's also very soft and smells laundry fresh.

Mel said...

My Mom accidentally let a cat in the dryer once. That story didn't end as happily. The worst part was we were staying in someone else's house. It wasn't even our cat.

BacktoBodrum said...

That's why cats have 9 lives.

urbanjane said...

That is tragic and hilarious. I have never heard of a cat ever living through a washing cycle. Yours must be special. Are you gonna keep her now?
Our cat used to shit in the washing machine, maybe she was getting her own back for her dead relatives.

Stranger said...

I don't know how she lived either, let alone unharmed. I would have thought the centripital force would have made her head explode.

I would rather not keep either of them. The laundry still smells funny.

Alan said...

. . I can't comment for laughing (all right, I nearly can't comment . . )