tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post4538681562962399389..comments2024-01-15T21:30:40.609+03:00Comments on Istanbul's Stranger: The Story of the Taxi Driver Who Treated Me Like A Normal PersonStrangerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-14177212582186539742011-04-22T15:42:22.231+03:002011-04-22T15:42:22.231+03:00Oh, I just loved this story! Reminds me of all the...Oh, I just loved this story! Reminds me of all the icky, gross, or otherwise strange taxi drivers I've had over the years! Even the ones who act nice with me are nice in a strange way! Oh, great story! :)Barbarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12412565447621643983noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-50014935829598653142011-04-20T22:23:31.990+03:002011-04-20T22:23:31.990+03:00@ Claudia, the break was really nice and also inte...@ Claudia, the break was really nice and also intense in some ways, thanks! I'm loving the news from Uzbekistan, too...<br /><br />Erika's right-- the sexual dimension to regular interactions isn't new in Turkey. It may not even be especially pronounced here. It's just that the lines are in different places, and it takes awhile to figure out where, exactly, they are. Plus navigating a foreign language, para-language, and meta-language. <br /><br />I think it's related to the fact that the separation between men and women is so much farther here than I'm used to, and it's really easy to have a completely different understanding of a friendly smile, or casual communication, or even eye contact.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-69571064256691910782011-04-20T11:50:54.281+03:002011-04-20T11:50:54.281+03:00I'm crying! I'm really crying from laughi...I'm crying! I'm really crying from laughing so hard! <br /><br />Sigh. <br /><br />My mom told me a long time ago you can't be too nice to men because they'll think you want them. My first time in Turkey, for me, was little different than being at home in that regard. Clearly, I wasn't from 'round there and that in itself drew a lot of attention but I had to be outright mean to my tour guide and the driver. The dude tried to tickle me for chrissakes and said he liked to hear me laugh. WTF?!?! Mind you I didn't interact with them at all but with the very multinational group. Apparently, they'd observed me with in the group laughing, genuinely, with complete abandon. Clearly I was open to other possibilities. :\Erikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08717332371261395978noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-74522129325785217892011-04-20T11:37:54.892+03:002011-04-20T11:37:54.892+03:00This made me laugh out loud! You have such a tongu...This made me laugh out loud! You have such a tongue in cheek style, and anyway I know EXACTLY what you are talking about.<br />Did you have a good break BTW?Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12220863323015658310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-51720877034877174852011-04-20T10:45:35.880+03:002011-04-20T10:45:35.880+03:00What a lovely story to sit and have my first cup o...What a lovely story to sit and have my first cup of coffee with this morning. Your story illustrates one thing that I have often thought about over the years. Namely, would I have stayed, or even enjoyed my time, had I been a woman. <br />I rather doubt it. <br /><br />As hard as it sometimes is in Turkey, I can imagine that throwing in a sexual dynamic to the whole thing would make it that much harder. <br /><br />Opportunists as they are, Turkish men tend to think- or rather fantasize, that every foreign woman is a nympho. (And the fact that a lot of people have, over the years, used Turkey to stage their sex escapades hasn't really helped much.) That idea probably works fine enough in Bodrum or Kusadasi but it doesn't translate so well out of season. And this just adds the problem between the sexes here. Still, as I have said many times, Turkey isn't so much different than back home. It's only that shock of seeing it a bit more openly and in your face that often stings and chafes.<br /><br />While I can easily understand why men enjoy such a unbalanced system, even more annoying/interesting is the fact that so many women simply buy into the whole male/female divide. I suppose if you cannot change it, you just learn to accept it and eventually try to make it work for you. For example, you see a lot of women whose only mission in life is to marry. There is this rush because, God knows their beauty won't last forever and makeup and flattering clothes can only go so far to complete the illusion. Personally as a child of the sixties, I find that kind of sad, but understandable. (And don't get me started on the mystery of cross-dressing and transexualism in Turkey. I'll stow that.)<br /><br />I will admit that very often I like that feeling of male comradery that exists here. I have the idea that a lot of foreign men do, but usually don't like to say that openly. In the US, the alternative was full on competition on every aspect of life which takes its toll.<br /><br />There is also the fact that many of the homeliest men- who back home would be snickered at by the less polite women, suddenly find themselves playing the frog transformed into a handsome prince. Like a fantasy come true, with Turkish women actually interested in them. In fact, that would be your taxi experience turned on its head. It is much more intoxicating than you might think too. These men often find themselves victim to a young woman looking to find her sugar daddy in their search for security. <br /> <br />You are lucky to have had a chance to get a peek at it. An insider's view. I have seen a lot of women who, after some careful conditioning, have had Turkish men accept them as an equal.(Seemingly anyway.) The results of the experiment, though, is usually only about 50% successful and quite often, many of the women actually find they'd prefer the special treatment they recieve as a woman compared to the faux-comradery that they discover as a female masked as a man.Nomadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03686282358562565742noreply@blogger.com