tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post1638355535553160639..comments2024-01-15T21:30:40.609+03:00Comments on Istanbul's Stranger: More Women, More Wine: An Argument For Polyandry and DrinkingStrangerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-60239067113548390292011-05-30T22:10:55.462+03:002011-05-30T22:10:55.462+03:00I seem to have avoided the latest blogger breakdow...I seem to have avoided the latest blogger breakdown, knock on wood.<br /><br />I'd actually never heard of muscovado sugar until last night. I had to look it up on Wikipedia.<br /><br />Still, definitely Carrefour is way better over there than the ones I've visited here (the one in Beylikdüzü was appalling!), and I was only a little bit impressed by Makro. Real was pretty good, but the only one I know of was pretty far away.<br /><br />Still, I'll have to pay a visit to that pork butcher when we get back from the US.<br /><br />xx Thanks, Cook!Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-36429643596768477302011-05-30T21:23:56.870+03:002011-05-30T21:23:56.870+03:00I am having problems leaving comments on my own bl...I am having problems leaving comments on my own blog so here's a reply to yours: muscovado sugar doesn't exist here, you are right. I bring it back from the UK. But for any recipe that requires it, you can mix regular white sugar with a little pekmez and that will do the trick. As for other foreign goodies, Makro or Carrefour are probably the best. Or there's Metro but you need a card to shop there. For pork, there is really only Şütte but it's pretty pricey :).<br />How are you commenting on your own blog??Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12220863323015658310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-56911941747955006502011-05-29T23:56:52.308+03:002011-05-29T23:56:52.308+03:00Thanks, Bülent (and how cool that's where we m...Thanks, Bülent (and how cool that's where we must have gotten the word "shirk" from in English!). I figured something went awry in translation there, but had no idea what. <br /><br />It isn't just the polytheism that's confusing-- it's also the sentence before that makes it sound like asking a man, "Why are you a polygamist?" amounts to sacrilege, where I suppose what she really means is that questioning the practice in general is sacrilege. <br /><br />But maybe she, or whoever wrote the translation, meant that to question a man about what he does is to question religion, if you're operating on the assumption that Muslim men are somehow better than women and people who question religious practices.<br /><br />It's a sticky problem, the legalizing part. I don't disagree that the women entering into polygamous marriages deserve something better (I hesitate to use the word "protection," as I'm guessing many of these women are consenting adults, however brainwashed and foolish they or their families may be). Like the headscarf thing, it's just another way for women to get screwed somewhere in the middle of legislation and religion. <br /><br />I'd say just go ahead and slap huge fines on the imams who perform these marriages, but who would enforce that? It would just force the practice underground anyway, thereby glorifying it somehow.<br /><br />This woman is, as you say Claudia, positively ridiculous. Since there is pretty much no mention of the hardships not-first wives face, I don't really accept that this interview/article is an honest attempt to start a rational debate on women's rights within Islam and how these rights may be protected under secular law. That she's paid by municipalities (presumably with taxpayer money-- is that where it's disappearing to is people like her?) pisses me off beyond measure (I get a paystub now, and watch my salary dwindle away month by month, and the strategically-times Haci Osman metro station is doing little to make me feel better about it). So I feel free to make fun of her, and this particular light in which Turkey and Islam are cast. There's a lot of "shame on you" to be cast around here, but Hürriyet's editors should be first in line for now.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-28699615785795895862011-05-29T21:22:35.960+03:002011-05-29T21:22:35.960+03:00First of all, this woman is just ridiculous. Secon...First of all, this woman is just ridiculous. Secondly, your take on it and your comments really really make me laugh. I just wonder how you get on in everyday life here?? I love your blog.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12220863323015658310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-12475726295627999202011-05-29T15:37:49.582+03:002011-05-29T15:37:49.582+03:00The translator[s] for Hurriyet used 'polytheis...The translator[s] for Hurriyet used 'polytheism' for <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shirk_%28Islam%29" rel="nofollow">shirk</a>. She means banning something that God allows amounts to accepting another authority than God that can reverse God's laws. <br /><br />If we had a good press corps and an intellectual class that actually explained things to the people you wouldn't have been puzzled. This line of thinking does exist [with some basis in scripture] and it may actually be the case that the state teaches this in state schools that teach religion. If legal secularism hadn't been taken to mean, for example, that we chase headscarved girls away from institutions perhaps this discussion would have happened years ago. There are several real problems here that need real solutions. <br /><br />In other news, I'm sure you'll be heartbroken to learn that Sema Aliye Kavaf hasn't even been renominated.Bulent Murtezaoglunoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-76834314559447385032011-05-29T14:04:25.169+03:002011-05-29T14:04:25.169+03:00The polytheism comment has to do with a fairly sta...The polytheism comment has to do with a fairly standard Muslim worldview. Polygamy is sanctioned by the Quran. To question someone who practices polygamy is in fact to question the Quran itself, a grave grave sin. The reference to polytheism is that it's one of the greatest sins in Islam and by questioning the Quran you are opening the door to other beliefs, polytheism being a standard reference as its eradication is one of Islam's main tenants.<br /><br />As for the legalizing bit, that's exactly what she's saying. She's saying by legalizing it, women would have rights just like any other married woman. Right now they do not in Turkey as polygamy isn't real. <br /><br />The idea that men must cheat is rather stupid, but accepted fact by most of the world and throughout much of history, the West included.<br /><br />It's certainly a different worldview, but the logic is quite sound if you come from that worldview.Nickhttp://turkeyinaflash.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-67589086019685052212011-05-29T10:19:24.175+03:002011-05-29T10:19:24.175+03:00I'm interested to hear it, Nomad. I haven'...I'm interested to hear it, Nomad. I haven't talked to men about this much, except for ones who are bragging or lying. I always supposed the cheating went on simply because it could-- because no one really expects men to man up and act like people, and because bad man behavior is sanctioned by both religion and culture.<br /><br />I also figured that marriage must be quite different here, and is more clearly an economic agreement rather than a partnership agreement-- cheating wouldn't matter so much so long as the man kept supporting his wife and family (except for the hurt feelings if a wife really loved her husband, or the kids not seeing their dad because he's always off with his mistress). I expect there are a lot of couples who don't love each other much and who look elsewhere to have their other needs meet, emotional or otherwise. I expect the men are getting more of those needs met, and the women are staying mainly because they either believe it's the right thing to do, or they are financially unable to leave.<br /><br />The lack of equality is the problem. It's not like the Roosevelts, who had their reasons for staying married and who mutually benefited from the marriage while being rather open about their outside dalliances. Unless it works both ways, the women (who are already losing in the marriage agreement, in terms of what they're getting out of it) are getting completely screwed, and are in a delicate and dependent position indeed. Same goes for the mistresses, for that matter.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09933997864575809110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2799914692887174209.post-17965104659844289102011-05-29T09:35:04.850+03:002011-05-29T09:35:04.850+03:00There were so many things wrong- abysmally wrong- ...There were so many things wrong- abysmally wrong- with that life coach's statement, I didn't even know where to start. First I was shocked to hear such silly things, esp from a woman, and then I was angry. After about three hours, (and a blog post) I decided that, in some ways, this discussion isn't so bad a thing. <br />DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND. I don't support anything she says but I would say. Needless to say, her ideas belong on the crackpot category. The shameful part of it is mainly that she earns a salary for saying things like this. <br /><br />However, taking a critical examination of the entire institution of marriage is probably not a totally bad thing. I was shocked, when I first came here, to find so much open cheating going on amongst married Turkish men. As a man, I was allowed to ask about it. From a non-judgmental sociological view, the things I learned were intriguing and gave me a new way of looking at men and women and how different their emotional needs actually are. (Turkey is my lab experiment!!) Anyway, it's a bit too long to go into as a comment but I'll try to explain more in a blog post sometime. Stay tuned.Nomadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03686282358562565742noreply@blogger.com